We had a meeting with the pastor and
were surprised that the woman's parents were present. They told us
that their daughter had become very secretive while in high school.
She had become pregnant between her sophomore and junior years and
because of weight gain, her parents had not found out about it until
she lost the child just before school started. After this happened,
she would not name the father and basically ignored her parents.
They were surprised that she had told
her husband and Brenda and Sue about her diabetes. She was happy
that they had tried to help her, but knew when she was unhappy, she
would not talk to anyone, not even her husband. The doctor arrived
after this and he confirmed that breast cancer may have been the
factor that set her off. He had asked her to bring her husband with
her, but she had refused and said she did not want her husband to
know.
The doctor did not realize that she was possibly
suicidal or he would not have told her about her breast cancer until
another family member was present. But after talking with her
parents, he doubted she would have permitted another family member to
have been present. He concluded that they are still waiting for the
cause of death so he may have misspoke in stating suicide. He stated
that he should have this on Wednesday and asked the parents if the
hospital should limit who received the information.
The parents said yes to limiting the
release of information and asked if the news could be limited to
avoid the newspapers from receiving the information. The doctor said
he would try, but the newspapers could not be prevented if they
wanted the information. The parents stated that her husband wanted a
small graveside funeral for them and his family and no one else and
had changed funeral homes because the one had said it would be put in
the newspaper against the family wishes.
Several of us agreed this may be for
the best and we would not spread the word. Her parents thanked us
and I said I would not release my blog until after the funeral and
the mother said she would tell Brenda after the funeral if that was
okay. We agreed and the pastor spent some time asking us questions
and said we are all sorry this happened, but it was not something we
could have anticipated or prevented. We thanked him for his time and
having her parents available to us and we thanked them for being
present and explaining what may have been behind her actions.
Therefore, even though I had wanted to
release this the day after the meeting, it may be several days before
this is posted.
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