I have said this before and I will
probably repeat this until I die. Lay people (people with type 2
diabetes and not possessing titles behind their names) often do more good in working with other people with type 2 diabetes than certified
diabetes educators (CDEs) or nurses will ever be able to do.
In a conversation recently with one of
our local doctors and amongst our own group, we have found out that
the level of education, but not the specialization in diabetes
education, is the greatest asset we have. Not all the members of our
support group have completed college, but many have. Another asset
we have is experience with type 2 diabetes and desire to help people.
This often pays dividends.
The doctor felt much of our success has
come from our desire to help others. He added that our level of
research is important and probably the fact that we are not tied to
the dogma of any organization has served us well. Allen said yes to
the last and added that we don't believe in secrecy and hiding our
diabetes from those that we talk to and attempt to help. Jason said
that our willingness to share and bring other members into the
conversation has also helped and made people we are trying to help
know that where one person may not have all the answers, another
person may be able to compliment another member of the group.
Sue made the statement that having come
from the side of being one of the 'diabetes police' has been a great
advantage. She knows what could have happened and did not happen to
her, and feels that she has a better awareness of the stereotyping
that exists because she had been guilty of doing this. Being one of
only two women in our group and receiving the support of the group
has taught her many things she would probably not have learned in a
largely female group.
Brenda agreed saying that the men in
the support group do most of the research and share the information.
While she felt that many women would do more research, our group was
unique because she and Sue did not have a lot of time for research,
but were not excluded because of that. Brenda commented that the day
Sue was welcomed into group, made her realize she was part of a group
she wanted to remain active in and participate when she could.
The doctor was not aware of this and
asked Sue to explain what had happened. Sue knew her husband; Bob
wanted to tell the story, so she let him. Bob said that often Sue
would be the diabetes police and be pestering those with diabetes
about their food choices and telling them, they should not be eating
that. Two days after her diagnosis, many of the group were together
at a function and several had noticed that she was not loading her
plate with deserts and were inquiring the reason.
Bob said he took the opportunity to out
her as now having type 2 diabetes. He admitted that he was thinking
that she was going to be paid back for her activities, but instead
questions were asked about her diabetes and support offered to help
her accept her diagnosis. He said she was angry with him for having
said anything, but he was excluded from the conversation and all
questions were directed to her. After she had tried not to answer a
few of the questions, the group had explained the process (similar to
grief) she would be going through. They said that when she was with
the group, secrecy was out and questions she had would be answered.
Bob then said they told her not to be
angry with me as she had enough anger about her diabetes. They said
that his telling us about your diabetes was the best thing for her as
now she could not keep it a secret and this would allow them to
provide help and answer her questions. Bob concluded that the group
had lived up to this and had helped her get off her medication and
provided ongoing support to help her stay off medications. He
continued that then they directed their attention to me and what I
needed to do to support her in managing her diabetes.
Sue said they even taught her about the
myths she had believed and how wrong they were. She said that the
biggest lesson she learned was that being on insulin did not mean
they were near the end of life, but living better because of insulin.
Sue felt that because her husband was learning about diabetes and
supporting her, when he was diagnosed with pre-diabetes, he was just
accepted as part of the group.
Tim said that we welcome family
members, but will not let them be like some people that run down the
group and always have something to say that is against people with
diabetes. He stated one support group that Jason, I and he had
attended, one family member stood up and berated the people for not
telling his wife to get over her diabetes and start doing the things
she should. Tim stated that as a group, we will not allow this and
will ask the people to leave saying that the person with diabetes is
welcome, but that they are not. We believe that support for each
other is everything and we won't tolerate this behavior.
The doctor said that must be the reason
his group likes meetings with this group and feel welcomed. He said
that the emails sent out after the meeting is greatly appreciated by
those that were not able to attend. Brenda said this is done for all
members when we have an email address. The doctor said he needed to
leave and he now understood more about the group and our desire to
remain independent from people in the medical profession. Tim said
he was always welcome because he was not pushing the ADA or other
dogma at us.