The other f-word you ask. That would
be fear. Then you add the d-word – diabetes – and people can
develop brain freeze and do nothing – the other d-word - denial.
Then we have the s-word – secrecy - that seems to take over and
people just don't want to take care of themselves or allow family
members to help.
The above is a prescription for trouble
and letting the complications gain the upper hand. This is happening
more often than it should and several of our diabetes support group
have lost friends in this situation. Allen has lost two friends in
the last year and now A.J. has lost a relative.
Tim had heard the news and suggested we
have a meeting about this. Everyone agreed and we had a short
meeting on Saturday afternoon, March 8. Everyone was present and
Susan was welcomed as a member. A.J. thanked us for our support, as
he was not sure what to do, as he had not been able to make a
difference in his cousin's life. His cousin's wife had asked for his
help and he had tried.
Then Brenda said she had lost a friend
about 6 months ago and had not said anything. Tim said that is why he had asked for
the meeting. He said we need to figure out how we as a group can
support each other and at the same time use intervention to help
these people. I said we need to explore several avenues. I said
that Dr. Tom would be here shortly and we should start with his
recommendations.
Allen said that would be a good place
to start. I added that there was another person that could help and
I would see what Dr. Tom thought about that. I said this is a
person, who specializes in interventions and he may be able to teach
us what we need to learn or what we should do.
At that point, Dr. Tom arrived and Tim
filled him in about the problems we were encountering. Dr. Tom said
he was not sure how to handle this and I suggested the doctor I had
spoken about earlier. Dr. Tom said this was probably the only person
we should consider. I said I had a question since I felt he wanted
to charge us for any help. Dr. Tom asked if he could call him and we
agreed. He excused himself, stepped outside the room, and called.
When he came back, he said I was right
and he would charge us for teaching us how to do a proper
intervention. Even Dr. Tom seemed upset and said to give him a few
days and he would see if there was anyone else that would help us.
He said that this should be something that should be done without
charge. He said that since he had talked to the doctor, several
names had come to him that may be of use and he wanted to check them
out before we talked to them.
Tim said this was okay, but we felt
that the sooner the better as three of the group has lost friends and
relatives. I then added that I had lost three friends that had
stopped dialysis when their kidneys had caused dialysis. I said that
I was not familiar with what had caused one to arrive at his
condition until at that point. The third had gone into denial, his
kidneys became bad, and he just refused to go to dialysis after the
first time. One was not from diabetes, but from an auto accident,
which I was told after his death.
Dr. Tom said let him see what he could do and if there was anyone that would speak to us without charging.
Allen said we should consider bringing in the other groups and
everyone agreed. Dr. Tom said this would be good and was needed and
now he would work to find someone to speak to the groups. Dr. Tom
asked Tim to call him late Friday if he or Allen had not received a
call.
Tim thanked everyone for coming on
short notice and for considering this important. He said to keep
time available, as this would probably be our March meeting if Dr.
Tom was successful. Dr. Tom asked if March 22 or 29 would be
acceptable – depending on weather. Everyone agreed and the meeting
ended.
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